A chance meeting with a Schlecht agent forces a humble coffee shop manager into the secret world of spies in Swinging London. With the help of his MI5 friend, he poses as the recently dead Major Cavendish who had managed to infiltrate the dreaded organization; he knows that they are intending to assassinate someone - could it be the famous Russian ballerina who has recently arrived for an appearance at Covent Garden?

Norman Truscott is a store worker who dreams of stardom. Vernon Carew is a singer whose star is fading. Vernon manages to get a recording of Norman singing and passes it off as himself.

Norman Pitkin wants to be a policeman like his father was, but he fails the height test (amongst others). One day he gets out his father's old uniform and "walks the beat". This leads to a level of chaos that only Pitkin could cause