a review of

I've had a lot of thoughts about this movie and just haven't had time to get them all out:

1. The stupid videogamey "new mission" title cards, the supernatural Smile-istic passing of the...affliction(?), the Unbreakable-ish "wrong-doing detector" (now with incessant Venom-esque voiceover)... All of it is just so bad and unnecessary and, perhaps most infuriatingly, shows a distrust in the audience to be able to put anything together themselves or fill in any blanks on their own. But maybe that could also be because...
2. ...the movie got a little convoluted when, on top of all of that nonsense, there's also a child abduction subplot written into this rinky-dink, small-ass, everyone-knows-everyone hick town where like 20% of the population happen to be Nazis, but absolutely no one was able to discover the abductor because one shit cop was helping and/or taking bribes from the guy (that has an underground ball pit beneath his... Christmas tree farm?). Trying to make this movie so edgy really just...
3. ...puts this is in line with the 2009 My Bloody Valentine and the 2009 Friday the 13th as far as quality remakes/reboots/reimaginings go. Not great company to be in! Any positive feelings I have toward this movie really only come from my enjoyment of the music that was just yanked right from the original movie itself. That all said: Sure, I'd watch a sequel.