This is less a movie, and more one of those cinematic E3 trailers stretched out to feature length. The plot is literally no deeper than the simple synopsis you can read online. So little thought went into the writing that there isn't even a conclusion. The credits just start rolling in the middle of a big battle. You might think there's some kind of issue going on at your theater when they first pop up, but then the stinger hidden a few seconds in makes it clear that's actually where they decided to leave things. So don't expect any sort of resolution or explanation behind anything. It also couldn't have gotten off on more wrong of a foot with me if it tried, as it quickly throws us in with a group of generic, cringe worthy tough guys and gals that embody the worst of military/soldier stereotypes. None of whom can act. Mercifully, the majority of them are killed off early on, leaving us with Milla Jovovich in the protagonist role as Cpt. Artemis and her costar Tony Jaa to carry the action forward. Unfortunately, both of them are portraying individuals so bland they might as well be actual avatars in a video game. There are no real characters to be found here. At least their chemistry is somewhat cute. About the only thing I can praise in this whole mess outside of some silly humor and the adorable "Meowscular Chef" are the visuals. The film is legitimately stunning to look at. Particularly whenever it breaks away from the sterile desert environment. The monster CGI is so good that it even blows the latest Godzilla and Kong movies out of the water. It's clear the budget went here rather than the script. This being a Paul W. S. Anderson film and given my enjoyment of his other works, I expected to have some nice things to say about the action as well. However, I ultimately found all of it to be a bunch of visual noise where each sequence and setpiece was designed to replace a plot, rather than serve one. As evident by the section where Jaa and Jovovich spend what feels like an eternity beating the crap out of each other rather than going ahead and teaming up to escape their predicament like we all know they're going to do anyways. Without a plot to follow or heroes to invest in, Monster Hunter has been left with nothing but its good looks to fill that void and an 1h 45m running time. As pretty as it's sights are they prove not enough to get the job done. There actually needed to be something of substance here to back them up. The lack of any real, meaningful, or even entertaining content to be found left me with a genuine and inexplicable sense of embarrassment to have been in attendance despite being the only person other than the family member I brought with me in the theater at the time. If that's not good enough a reason to stay home and play one of the video games this is based on instead, I don't know what is.