恋爱n件套
爱的艺术 豆瓣
7.9 (33 个评分) 作者: [美]艾里希·弗洛姆 译者: 刘福堂 人民文学出版社 2018 - 11
《爱的艺术》是美国社会心理学家和哲学家、法兰克福学派重要成员艾里希•弗洛姆的著名作品,自1956年出版至今已被翻译成三十二种文字,在全世界畅销不衰。
在本书中,弗洛姆认为,爱情不是一种只需投入身心的感情,而是需要努力发展自己的全部个性,以此形成一种创造倾向,否则,一切爱的尝试都是会失败的。如果没有爱他人的能力,不能谦恭、勇敢、真诚、自制地爱他人,就不可能得到满意的爱。
弗洛姆进而提出,爱是一门艺术,想要掌握这门艺术的人,需要有这方面的知识并付出努力去学习。既要学习爱的理论,也要在爱的实践中学习。
2022年12月28日 已读
这本书写的非常精彩!作者在第一章就开始破除我的各种误解,比如爱不是自己能否被人爱、而是有没有能力爱人,爱不仅仅是互相喜欢的对象、更要理解爱情本身的意义,堕入情网是短暂的、持久的爱更需要成熟的能力。解释过爱为什么是一种艺术之后,作者又解读了爱是人类存在的答案——爱是一种积极的情绪,是给予而不是索求和得到;爱还要求关心、责任心、尊重、了解和信仰。这一套修炼是能够谦恭、勇敢、真诚、有纪律地爱人的基础。在爱情之外,作者其实还提到了父母对孩子的爱,竟然还有点儿理解了一些东雅原生家庭之困 😂
原本以这本书带来的开眼程度可以打五星的,但是可能由于时代的局限性,作者的立场非常异性恋、非常不女权,对于女性更多的阐述站在了母职的立场上,认为男女在一起是阴阳大和谐 LOL。这些部分随便看看就算啦~
恋爱n件套
Eight Dates 豆瓣
作者: John Gottman Ph.D. / Julie Schwartz Gottman Ph.D. Workman Publishing Company 2019 - 2
Strengthen and deepen your love with a fun, ingenious program of eight life-changing conversations—on essential topics such as money, sex, and trust—from two of the world’s leading marriage researchers and clinicians.
Navigating the challenges of long-term commitment takes effort—and it just got simpler, with this empowering, step-by-step guide to communicating about the things that matter most to you and your partner. Drawing on forty years of research from their world-famous Love Lab, Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman invite couples on eight fun, easy, and profoundly rewarding dates, each one focused on a make-or-break issue: trust, conflict, sex, money, family, adventure, spirituality, and dreams.
Interactive activities and prompts provide motivation to stay open, stay curious, and, most of all, stay talking to each other. And the range—from the four skills you need for intimate conversation (including Put Into Words What You Are Feeling) to tips on being honest about your needs, while also validating your partner’s own emotions—will resonate, whether you’re newly together or a longtime couple looking to fortify your bond. You will discover (or rediscover) your partner like never before—and be able to realize your hopes and dreams for the love you desire and deserve.