1/10
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星球大战节日特典 (1978) 豆瓣 IMDb TMDB 维基数据
The Star Wars Holiday Special
2.2 (5 个评分) 导演: Steve Binder 演员: 马克·哈米尔 / 哈里森·福特 …
其它标题: 스타 워즈 홀리데이 스페셜 / The Star Wars Holiday Special …
《星战假日特别版》是一部以《星球大战》的银河系为背景，长度约为两个小时的电视特别节目（中间包括广告），第一次也是唯一一次完整播出实在1978年 12月17日周五晚上8点整到10点（美国东部时间）的美国CBS电视台。片中乔巴卡和汉索罗回到了乔巴卡的家兄Kashyyyk星球庆祝Life Day，途中遭到正在到处搜寻叛军的银河帝国军队的追击。乔巴卡的家人，包括岳父、妻子和儿子也都在其中登场。故事的主要场景设置在雅汶战役刚刚结束后的 Kashyyyk星球，也穿插着一些在千年隼号和帝国星际驱逐舰上的情景。此外还通过综艺秀和卡通段落介绍了一些其他场景，包括塔图因沙漠中的一家酒馆以及一个名为Panna的水星等等。《星球大战》中的主要角色，包括卢克天行者、C-3PO、R2-D2、达斯维达、汉索罗以及莉亚公众全都在片中客串登场（但是在演员表上被列成了主演），一些《星球大战》中被剪下的段落也用到了本片中。《星战假日特别版》最为人称道的一点便是在卡通场景中首次引入了赏金猎人波巴费特这个角色，此外它也是星战系列的第一部官方授权衍生影片。
2020年12月1日 看过
2020年12月1日 评论 a review of 星球大战节日特典 - Imagine being a kid in 1978. Star Wars just took over the world the year prior and left you desperately wanting more. So when you catch wind there's going to be a new holiday special that features the actual cast from the movie that's going to be broadcasted straight to your living room for free? Why, that's a bonafide Christmas miracle! You anxiously await the big day with bated breath and when it finally arrives this turd starts playing. It's a wonder the franchise didn't die right then and there. Things start off deceptively good with Han Solo and Chewbacca dodging fire from Star Destroyers in the Millennium Falcon before that classic Star Wars theme starts playing and the screen cuts away to words that are imbedded in the minds of every fan "a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away." It's hard to not get chills and you just know you're in for a good time. At least that's what you think. Next thing you know you're in a treehouse on Kashyyyk with Chewie's Wookie family awkwardly growling at each other and it is BOOOOORING. Unfortunately, this where the majority of the special takes place. Every now and then someone like Carrie Fisher or Mark Hamill will show up for a brief cameo, or we'll get to see Harrison Ford shoot down some TIE fighters for a few seconds, but for the most part the only times we're allowed to get away from these annoying and unintelligible walking carpets is when one of the bizarre variety show segments is taking place. These are usually either extremely misguided attempts to be funny that wildly miss the mark (and end up disturbing the viewer more than anything), or an overly long musical performance. The only one that's any good is the animated short that introduced audiences to the cooler-in-appearance-than-he-ever-actually-ended-up-being Boba Fett and features an art style reminiscent of 1981's Heavy Metal and Genndy Tartakovsky's Clone Wars series. Everything else is dull, borderline painful, and frightening. About the only thing this special gets right is the production quality. The sets, special effects, and costumes are darn near on the same level as the movies. Which is to say they blow away anything else that was on TV in the '70s. Showing that even at its lowest point Star Wars NEVER phoned it in when it came to visuals. Of all the weird, shoddy products that have been crapped out onto the market so that this undeniable gold mine of a property can be exploited for every seemingly endless cent possible, this is by far the worst. It's hard to really put into words what makes it so awful because a lot of this has to be seen to be believed. Suffice to say, there are some corners of the Star Wars that should have never have been explored and the Wookie's seasonal "Life Day" was one of them. I don't even understand what the whole Life Day thing was supposed to be after watching this anyways.
1/10
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末日迷踪 (2014) 豆瓣 IMDb TMDB 维基数据
Left Behind
3.2 (30 个评分) 导演: 维克·阿姆斯特朗 演员: 尼古拉斯·凯奇 / 查德·迈克尔·墨瑞 …
其它标题: Left Behind / 레프트 비하인드: 휴거의 시작 …
影片改编自同名小说，讲述由凯奇扮演的机长驾驶飞机在万米高空突遇诡异气象，同时地球上成百万人神秘消失。凯奇要将破损的飞机迫降，地面上他的女儿也要寻找失踪的妈妈和弟弟。
2019年7月20日 看过
2019年7月20日 评论 a review of 末日迷踪 - This is quite possibly the worst film of Nicolas Cage's career, and we all know how many stinkers he's been in. The vast majority of the blame for that falls on Vic Armstrong. Not saying the man didn't have his work cut out for him due to a questionable script and low budget, but his terrible direction is what really kills the movie. Whether it's inspiring career worst performances from a cast of usually competent actors or awkwardly fumbling through scenes to the point of sometimes unintentional hilarity, Armstrong is just never able to make the story work for him. Everything feels so unnatural and forced. Trash cinema enthusiasts will likely get a kick out of the downright bizarre exchanges characters have with one another. Although the generic, made-for-TV drama style the movie is shot in makes it a total snoozefest even when the explosions and aircraft trouble take center stage. That's Armstrong's biggest failing. He simply couldn't make any of this even remotely interesting. That overly long 1h 51m running time drags by like a one-legged dog. Did I mention this is supposed to be faith-based? I almost forgot because the actual references to God are so few. In a self-defeating move the writers even failed at their attempt to scare people to the altar with an inept, "wait for the sequel" ending that leaves everything unresolved. So in the end this a movie that's more likely to have you sleeping through the rapture rather than dropping to your knees in repentance. Dear God, I'm so sorry they did you this way.
1/10
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邮政恐怖份子 (2007) 豆瓣 维基数据 IMDb TMDB
Postal
6.3 (11 个评分) 导演: Uwe Boll 演员: Zach Ward / Dave Foley …
其它标题: Postal: The Movie / 포스탈 …
《喋血街头》，畅销18禁暴力电玩改编，游戏标榜“献给对人生不满的玩家”，攻击的对象不只是人，还包括动物。主角是一名精神病患，手边将有一个汽油桶和一根火柴，随时对付看不爽的人。
而电影是一部不折不扣地美国c级黑色喜剧，同样充斥着横飞的内脏和屎尿屁笑话，以及忠实的还原了温情背景音乐下的枪林弹雨和平民横尸遍野的优雅情景~~
主人公是一个衰到爆的失业工人，住着破烂的房车，大白熊一样的老婆还整天被人搞，他的叔叔戴维是一个搞邪教农场的，利用低级又弱智的教义圈着一群嬉皮，但是自称自由美国的这个教主同样要为支付高额的纳税金而头疼，机缘下，两人准备合作盗取一批全球限量的玩具来筹钱，就在他们向玩具首发地-一个德国主题公园进发的时候，他们不知道，一群跟他们有相同目的的塔利班分子也在虎视眈眈…………
2018年12月31日 看过
2018年12月31日 评论 a review of 邮政恐怖份子 - This might be Uwe Boll's most well-realized film. Postal was meant as his big 'F-you' to Hollywood and anybody else who ever said a bad word about him or his movies. So naturally he poured everything he had into it. The results are one of the most competently made works of his career. I just wish all of that effort had gone to something that wasn't so puerile. Postal is ridiculous, disgusting, and offensive. Basically everything it was supposed to be. Boll was actively trying to push the boundaries of good taste and he succeeded marvelously. There are moments of genuinely outlandish comedy and it's even sporadically funny. Something that's mostly due to the talent involved rather than the actual content. Seriously, this has some of the best acting of any Uwe Boll movie. The cast was totally game. The satire of post-9/11 America often leans too heavily into the exact same kind of pointless, excessive violence it criticizes. The messages also get buried under the intentionally gratuitous vulgarity of the material. Boll didn't realize that taking things too far in his effort to cross the line like he did was going to get in the way of what he was ultimately trying to accomplish. Postal is the result of two conflicting intents that undermine each other to the point of accidental self-sabotage. This wasn't just a work of passion, but of egotism as well and it shows. It's almost perfect that the words "Live action South Park " can be found on the movie's poster. Because it too contains coarse language and due to its content should not be viewed by anyone. I still respect the heck out of the movie though, as it's legitimately one of the best of Uwe Boll's stint as a director. He really pulled out all the stops.
1/10
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新尸骨无存 (2016) 豆瓣 IMDb 维基数据 TMDB
Cabin Fever
3.8 (16 个评分) 导演: Travis Zariwny 演员: 伊莱·罗斯 / 马修·达达里奥 …
其它标题: Cabin Fever / 尸骨无存 …
在一个阳光明媚的日子里，凯伦（盖琦·格莱特利 Gage Golightly 饰）、保罗（塞缪尔·戴维斯 Samuel Davis 饰）、杰夫（马修·达达里奥 Matthew Daddario 饰）、玛茜（娜蒂安·克劳克 Nadine Crocker 饰）、伯特（达斯汀·英格拉姆 Dustin Ingram 饰）等五位好友来到了一个远离城市喧嚣的山林度假。男男女女尽情享受浪漫时光，脑子有点儿二的伯特则拿着半自动步枪玩耍，却不小心伤到了路人。夜幕降临，他们回到小屋休息。而就在此时，被伯特射伤的男人前来求救。伯特为了隐藏真相谎称该男子被神秘病毒感染，以致于众人下狠手将其拒之门外。
这一事件彻底摧毁了他们的假期，等待几个年轻人的还有更为恐怖的事情……
2018年10月11日 看过
2018年10月11日 评论 a review of 新尸骨无存 - I have nothing against remakes. So long as they're good. They give other people a chance to revisit characters and premises with their own ideas thrown into the mix. At least they should. That didn't happen here. This is the exact same movie Eli Roth made 14 years prior. Just with a gender-swapped Winston, a removal of the more risqué humor, and one or two other negligible differences. I didn't feel like my time was wasted because I watched a movie I had already seen before, but because I watched an inferior version. Some made-for-TV rehash with terrible acting from one of the least charismatic ensemble casts ever assembled. Despite being brought to life by more modern practical effects, the gore is nowhere near as memorable. The leg shaving scene is the only thing in the movie that stands out as better than it was in the original. Everything else is markedly worse. Dustin Ingram brings a modicum of entertainment to this disaster as Bert, an already funny character, but he's no James DeBello. I'm not usually the guy screaming that some remake shouldn't exist and I typically look down on those who do. That being said I really don't understand why this was made. There's nothing new here. No improvements, no new material, and no reason to watch it. It's a step back in every way.
1/10